Into a Writer's Head

Dancing Queen...

Or, observations made while out dancing.

• If you look like you're being electrocuted while you are dancing, it's probably better for you to go find a seat, and maybe drink more beer.
  
• Don't ever, ever ask the band to play something like the song whose chorus goes: "I come from the land down under". It's just embarrassing for everyone.
• Order Diet Coke when you go up to the bar. They WILL remember you.
• Get in good with the band...They will watch your jackets for you.
• When you see a friend of your ex's, be sure to be friendly, but not too friendly. Do not allow time for an actual conversation when dancing can be had.
• Go in the winter. Less people can get to the bar during the holiday season thanks to parties...this means more room for you.
• Stay away from the women who insist on holding their tote bag-size purses while dancing. You can never be sure what they're carrying in them.
• Do invite friends. Especially if you are the only one who will dance. This keeps the creepy, learing, drunk men at a distance (usually).
• Do not push everyone out of your way so you can get to the front of the floor, only to turn around and invite someone who has moved out of your way closer. It just makes you seem drunk and crazy. We will step further away.
• Yes, the dancefloor is your place to show off those fancy lessons you've been taking. But please, make sure you have enough room to do it.
• When the band asks you to make sure everyone has fun and no fights break out, that probably means don't hit anyone or spill beer on them.
• No cigarettes on the dance floor=good. I love to move without flaming sticks of death in my way.
• If your friend is so drunk he can't walk, maybe you should sit down for a minute, or call a cab to take you to your car.
• Make nice with the bouncers. They will remember you and look out for you.
• Dance your booty off! It doesn't matter if you are the only one out there. Someone needs to start things off.

Thus ends my observations. Back to your regularly scheduled program.

posted by Erin @ 10:30 AM